Parent/English Translator

Despite having impressive vocabularies, adults are terrible at saying what they mean. Most of them communicate entirely through vague Facebook statuses, emojis, dramatic sighs and Bruno Mars lyrics. Toddlers, learning how to translate the words of adults around you is key if you're to succeed in this world.

Learn the phrases below. Good luck.

My book drops in 12 days. If you preorder it now, Amazon or Barnes & Noble will also send you a goat that produces the freshest, thickest milk you've ever had the pleasure of drinking. It will be like cool, liquid butter in a glass with a hint of sweetness.* Preorder The Honest Toddler: A Child's Guide to Parenting 

Honest Toddler
This is a popular bookstore.
They prefer inside voices but talk as loud as you want. They'll look at you but won't do anything.

*there's no goat

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